Funny Sarcastic Quotes


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The youth of America is their oldest tradition. It has been going on now for three hundred years.
~ Oscar Wilde
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32
If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.
~ George Bernard Shaw
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33
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.
~ Oscar Wilde
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34
Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
~ Homer Simpson
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35
You know, I'm no art critic. But I know what I hate.
~ Montgomery Burns
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36
This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
~ Oscar Wilde
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37
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
~ Ambrose Bierce
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38
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.
~ Oscar Wilde
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39
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victems he intends to eat until he eats them.
~ Samuel Butler
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40
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.
~ Oscar Levant
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