Funny Senior Quotes


We have the best collection of funny senior quotes or funny quotes about senior for you to enjoy and share.


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1
I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap.
~ Bob Hope
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2
To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the 'C' students, I say you too may one day be President of the United States.
~ George W. Bush
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3
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
~ Herbert Henry Asquith
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4
Without education we are in a horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously.
~ G.K. Chesterton
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5
Don't worry about avoiding temptation... as you grow older, it will avoid you.
~ Winston Churchill
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6
It’s not a field, I think, for people who need to have success every day if you can’t live with a nightly sort of disaster, you should get out. I wouldn’t describe myself as lacking in confidence, but I would just say that the ghosts you chase you never catch.
~ John Malkovich
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7
You send your child to the schoolmaster, but 'tis the schoolboys who educate him.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
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8
We all carry around so much pain in our hearts. Love and pain and beauty. They all seem to go together like one little tidy confusing package. It’s a messy business, life. It’s hard to figure–full of surprises. Some good. Some bad.
~ Henry Bromel
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9
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.
~ Billy Crystal
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10
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.
~ Will Rogers
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11
Recently, I was asked if I was going to fire an employee who made a mistake that cost the company 600,000. No, I replied, I just spent 600,000 training him. Why would I want somebody to hire his experience.
~ Thomas John Watson Sr
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12
Maybe it's true that life begins at 50... but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
~ Phyllis Diller
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13
The purpose of a liberal education is to make you philosophical enough to accept the fact that you will never make much money.
~ Anonymous
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14
My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.
~ Ed Furgol
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15
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.
~ Theodore Roosevelt
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